D Cyclone NUTS Chronicles #18 C

November 21, MMVII


Loading IO.SYS...
Loading MSDOS.SYS...
Loading COMMAND.COM...
Loading CONFIG.SYS...
Phasecycle: PSFRG304568140694328;ICON;16-79OMUT;94-37RMUT

< Salute, pilots from Wing X, Wing Commander Angel, Commodore Darklord and last but not least Flight Officer Daniel Bonini >


Welcome to this, my eighteenth Weekly Report for my beloved Squadron, the mighty Cyclone, "The Demolition Crew". First of all I want to present all you my most sincere apologies for having delayed this report for sooo long. It should have been ready last Sunday but as I already told you my RL PhD work prevented me to do my CMDR job as usual. -__-U Well, at least I tried to do all BSFing by the book as well as tracking all your activity as I use to do it. Let's hope I can find time enough in days ahead to mantain my TC activity at its usual level; next January it's my PhD presentation and I'm pretty sure I'll have further work-hell sooner than I'd like to think. :-\

As you will see, this report is much more precise, much more exact, much more accurate, much more... SHORT than my usual WSRs xD And although I *KNOW* you would like all them to be as this one in behalf of what it's left from your sanity I can't promise anything beyond "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn" or "No way in hell". It's not sooo easy to get rid of me, my friends. And feel free to forward me your complaints if you want; I'll pay you the same attention as one of my wingmen when flying... and I'm a highscore hunter... and you don't want to know what I use to do with my wingmen to prevent them stealing MY Score... >:)

And as for your activity last week, what can I say? Almost all you are doing an excellent work in RtF! I'm but very happy and proud of you and those who are performing splendid for such an important competition which could make us to be the next "TCCOM's Own" Squadron shall see their efforts rewarded very soon. ^_^

I.) But I thought I'd find some Kansas flying farm here!! (aka. Squadron News)


V "Raise the Flag 2007" still running!! ISD Challenge leads ship-wise as Cyclone leads Squadron-wise and myself lead "lacking-of-a-life" dude-wise. Nuff said. The Graphics bonus competition ended some days ago with some crazy Major bringing 100!! more points for the Squadron and the ship after submitting what you've heard it was an excellent banner featuring all the ships, the EH shield in the background and whatnot... actually it was just a pic of the Flight Office personnel after one of their official/classified meetings. I was going to send it to the Fleet Commander himself but in the end I thought they would be interested in having it back. :-J Colonel Maverick got 5th place and 8 points and Lieutenant Kate 10th with another 8 points! The Multiplayer bonus competition will last until tomorrow and we'll see what happens there but just for you to know: I already put a few shots there too! ;-) For those of you who are also participating, GL & HF!!

V Admiral Dempsey strikes again! In her neverending struggle to "create" FCHG points from scratch in order to reach Imperator rank (you applied to be there just for that, don't lie, Ma'am!! xD) she gives us another 2 TIE battles! Stop your slackering NOW and go for some new flying with:

TIE-TC 234: Pacification
TIE-FREE 269: Fleet Commander's Birthday Gift

V Admiral Dempsey (not her again :__D) finally did it! Pilots, HERE you are the new and fresh Wiki Editing [WIKI] IWATS Course so you can learn how to use the "Encyclopedia Imperia" and tell us all how was when you were awarded your Medal of Honor. Oh well, you can also write there some TRUE FACTS but that wouldn't be so funny. xD And don't forget the're shinies to grab from this Course as long as THIS competition is running!

     Further considerations: the first pilot under my command I catch lying at the Wiki will have to face the possibility of me lying to his mother about why he suddenly disappeared in strange circumstances.

V Lieutenant Commander Vertigo, Flight II Leader, returned from his week-LoA and took again command of his Flight from LCM Verde, who did an excellent work on his absence. And he couldn't have returned in a better way: with tons of pilot files for me to BSF!! :-D Welcome back, Vertigo! Everybody here were waiting for you to return. Find them laying under Wing X Cantina tables.

V Hmmmpfff... bad stuff. Last week we said bye to Lieutenant Commander Godo Nurok, Cyclone 3-4, who was reassigned into the M/FRG Phoenix at his own request after a long period of inactivity, apart from his usual excellent levels of communication, due to heavy RL constraints. Farewell, Godo! We wish you the best in RL and I personally hope to see you back as soon as possible. =)

     Now it's official: all pilots from the Cyclone Squadron I met not being in command yet are gone. They could say I'm some kind of crazy monster and those who already knew me and could escape in time did just that. Maybe they are more right than you'd like to think. Only time will tell... watch your six! And your twelve! And your three! And your nine! And...!

V Please note that all stuff from this very week (as recent MWE awards from October) will be mentioned in my next WSR on Sunday 25th... or at least I hope for it to be ready on Sunday 25th, may the Daze Side of The Booze be with me... :-P


( Ok, just say the word "Spoiler" and I'll make you to mop the floor at my Secret Destillery and clean it from furballs until mynocks learn to sing as mezzo-sopranos... >:P )

II.) As if we haven't enough already with all the TC database stuff!! (aka. Squadron Status and On-going Competitions)


R Then again, my minions, your work in "Raise the Flag" has been splendid to date. At least from *almost* all of you... ¬_¬ (those of you still with the same activity records you had one week after your arrival will hear from me as soon as I can use some of my precious time to ask you WTF?!!! as necessary) Keep it on!! We're leading but RtF is still far from its end and we can't let our opponents to think we died or something. Even when it's obvious that we have all the tickets to win it's NOT enough! Let's punish their morale yet a little more!! >.-D

Q Take a look at this Wiki entry that Lieutenant Kate made for Cyclone HERE as well as this one for her own character HERE and you'll see what would you be capable to do in behalf of your own fame following her steps, apart from completing your INPRs. Oh, and also LCM Verde made one for himself HERE! :-D

     Speaking of which, and this one goes for our newest pilots: will I ever see your INPRs done? It's not mandatory but it's funny and it will count towards your activity! What is an INPR you say?! O__o (*SIGH*) Start playing with your "Administration tools" at the TC database after login in and you'll find it... ¬_¬

Q Yet another weekly Cyclone website update, as usual. Don't forget to check the site often as one of your primary sources of useful information and bollocks of all kinds. All complaints are to be sent directly to my PhD professors explaining them that I'm actually a Squadron Commander within the TIE Corps and I have a Fleet to serve. Include also a reccomendation for the asylum where I'm going to be enclosed until LC Tempest starts playing XWA and RA Darklord decides to change the booze for home-made lemonade to be comfortable. ^_^u

Q And here you are the current (yeah, from last week :-P) status of our Squadron-level competitions for November! Outstanding work, lady and gentlemen! Keep it up and maybe I'll forget the last time you used my "flying office" to test your new ordnance of advanced concussion missiles. Rooooargh... >:F

Cyclone Pilot of November '07 - December '07

LT Katherine Cantor Flyer - 112 missions
LCM Vertigo - 101 missions
LCM Verde - 74 missions
COL Maverick - 34 missions
LT Brian Klem - 23 missions

Cyclone Student of November '07 - December '07

LT Katherine Cantor Flyer - 6 IWATS Courses
LT Brian Klem - 1 IWATS Course
LCM Verde - 1 IWATS Course

A little HS for a Cyclonite, a major hit against the NR punks!

I'm still waiting for any of you interested enough in having a HS-hunting competition for ourselves to contact me in order to submit a new edition of this one. It's up to you, guys! My duty is to provide you with ways of improving yourselves as TC pilots but if you prefer to improve as standing ergonomic chairs feel free to do so. But please, don't come later bitching about why on hell so many people out there always outscore you in Fleet-wide SP flying competitions! ):-F

II.a) Squadron Competitions

P Cyclone Pilot of the Month November '07 - December '07
Details HERE
This classic "flying-tons" competition on its newest edition. I won't participate so YOU KNOW what to do!!

O Cyclone Student of the Month November '07 - December '07
Details HERE
Because here we also learn... slackering at least

II.b) Wing / Ship Competitions

L Challenge Top Gun #3
Details HERE
A whole month to fly 2 FREE missions hunting highscores... the best excuses for not flying them will be awarded a rabid Ewok fencing a pitchfork!!
This month's sorties are:

L Wing X Pilot of the Week #2
Details HERE
And here we have again the classic Wing X PotW/PotM!! But behold! This time it's a strictly flying one and the Iron Stars come with wings and not ribbons. FLY!! Fly as hell and don't even think why are you doing so and you may get IS-SWs/IS-BWs, a broken joystick and a brand new mental disorder. 3 for the prize of 1!! :D

II.c) Emperor's Hammer / TIE Corps / TC Battlegroups Competitions

Oh! Oh my good Lord!! But if I'm going to repeat some TC site info here. Please, have mercy!! :-P

L Ace of the TIE Corps - October 2007 (November edition not submitted yet but it will be there 100% sure)
Details HERE
Simple, pretty simple: fly as hell, make your CMDR's life miserable BSFing your stuff and earn medals for it. IS-GW, IS-SW and IS-BW for the 3 best ranking players at the Single Player Kill Board. What else do you need to fill your IDline with useless titles as myself?

L Raise the Flag 2007
Details HERE
It's here!! It's happening again! The rest of the TC ships dare to question our "Flagship" title once again. This cannot be!! During this whole month we will teach them to keep themselves where they should be... UNDER US! And I hope the best from all you for this to happen... or else* ( * =
something so horrible and nasty that I fear even to tell you about for the sakes of your mothers' happiness)

L Raise the Flag 2007 - Multiplayer Bonus Competition
Details HERE
The third Bonus Competition for RtF! 150, 100 & 75 extra bonus points plus the classic IS-stuff trio for the 3 best participants. You have until Thursday 22nd (TOMORROW!!) to submit both to the FO and the COO your MP matches reports using the appropiate format plus the scores screenshots attached as "24/7 LoCs"... and compress those screenies to JPGs by Palpatine's sakes or we'll get your LoCs and will make you to
<CoC CENSORED> them!! >:F

L Raise the Flag 2007 - Single Player Bonus Competition
Details HERE
This, the last RtF Bonus Competition hasn't started yet but our good old FO already made it to be approved by the Training Office so there you've the stuff you have to fly to get yourselves 200, 150 or 100 extra bonus points plus the classic IS-wreckage. Damn! Those are just too many points to let them go. Go and accomplish with your duty, pilots!! I want all you to do your best here or you'll have me doing my worst there >:P

L SECO Banner competition
Details HERE
Now it's Vice Admiral Apophis Kuma, our new SO, who wants a banner for his office. IS-SW and IS-BW... for making a banner?!! And no goldies in a TC-wide comp.?!!! Well, I'll just include it here as usual but be ready to see those basis modified or something. :-P

L [WIKI] Release Party
Details HERE
Admiral Dempsey provided us with a new excellent IWATS Course for us to learn how to screw our EH Wiki (Encyclopedia Imperia) up! The first 3 working-brains scoring 100% on it will be awarded ISs with an IS-GR for the first and so on. Aaaaand if you're among the first 8 students passing it you'll have an easy IS-BR. Then again, not to mention the possibility of annoying the FC sending all to hell xD
<--- I'll negate having said this... ¬_¬

L MP Ace of the TIE Corps - October 2007 (November edition not submitted yet but it will be there 100% sure)
Details HERE
MP division of the monthly Ace competition above. KILL everybody and feel proud for it!!
IS-GW, IS-SW and IS-BW for the 3 best ranking players at the Multiplayer Kill Board. You gotta love it!!

L Build that mission!
Details HERE
Admiral Dempsey is still looking for a capable guy to hit the 100% in TM/3. Go and teach her what you're capable of!

L TAC's Best (november 2007)
Details HERE
Great!! Lovely!! Not only the highscore-hunters around will see their FCHG increased while destroying your hopes slowly but they'll also earn IS-GWs and IS-SWs for it! Your only hope? To be ONE OF THOSE damned highscore-hunters!

H Wednesday's Vaping Rhapsody (Multiplayer!!)
My own hosted MP competition! Played on #ehcoo every Wednesday from 12:30 EST to 15:30 EST. Either XvT, XWA, FW or IA matches and DFCs available for those skillful enough to get one!

G TIE Corps Capital Brawl (Multiplayer!!)
Hosted by the COO, Vice Admiral Stryker, every Wednesday on #ehcoo from 14:00 EST to 19:00 EST. Exclusive FW Multiplayer competition involving capital ships matches. DFCs up for grabs and bribes.

F TIE Corps Training (Multiplayer!!)
Exactly the same as my own competition but hosted also by Vice Admiral Stryker it happens every Saturday on #ehcoo from 13:00 EST to 16:00 EST.

III.) No activity?!! You're in the Eye of the Cyclone, by Palpatine's sake! You should be at least dying!

III.a) Transfers / Promotions/ Awards / Bribes


1-1 MAJ Zósite Kónstyte Styles   

  • NOTHING?!!! I want to die... (:___D


3-2 LT Katherine Cantor Flyer    

  • Awarded 2 LoCs


3-4 LCM Godo Nurok    

  • Cyclone 2-3 (Flight Member) ---> M/FRG Phoenix (Reservist)


III.b) General Activity and other dreams alike

( Notation: Low/Crappy Activity Moderate Activity High/Very High Activity Insane Activity/BSF hate!! )


1-1 MAJ Zósite Kónstyte Styles   

  • Completed TIE-TC 181 (AGAIN) (4 missions) (Highscores in ALL missions and Battle Highscore!).
  • Completed XvT-TC 34 (AGAIN) (8 missions) (Highscores in missions 1,3-7 and Battle Highscore!).
  • Completed BoP-IW 2 (AGAIN) (6 missions) (Highscores in ALL missions and Battle Highscore!).
  • Completed XWA-TC 12 (AGAIN) (6 missions) (Highscores in missions 1,3-6 and Battle Highscore!).
  • Completed TIE-TC 109 (AGAIN) (5 missions).
  • Completed TIE-TC 109 (YET AGAIN) (5 missions) I'm trying to help the TAC to fix some problem with my pilot files ;P
  • Completed TIE-TC 110-112,114,115,118,119,124,125,128,131,132,136,138,139,141-145 (AGAIN) (101 missions!).
  • Completed TIE-TC 147,149-152,154,156,161,163,166,168,169,171-176,182,183 (AGAIN) (102 missions!).
  • Completed TIE-TC 186-190,192,194,195,200,208 (AGAIN) (60 missions).
  • Graded [MP/2] IWATS.
  • Starts participating in November XvT WoW.
  • Completed TIE-FREE 125 & 232 for "TIE Golf".

1-2 LT Cochala        x 2

  • No contact since... since... I can't remember... just wait until RtF is over and we'll talk a little, Lieutenant >;P

1-3 LT Lvpps        x 2

  • Exactly the same as LT Cochala up there... ¬_¬

1-4 CPT Bjorn Wolfblade       

  • Played 2 Multiplayer matches in "24/7 LoCs" against LT Katherine C. Flyer.
  • Played 3 Multiplayer matches in "24/7 LoCs" against MAJ Zósite.
  • Played 3 Multiplayer matches in "24/7 LoCs" against MAJ Zósite.
  • Good presence on IRC and excellent communications through #tiecorps, #wing_x and #ehcoo!

2-1 LCM Vertigo          (those HSs really deserve one of these when added to the rest of your activity ^^)

  • Returns from his week-LoA!
  • Completed XvT-CAB 1,2 & 4 (18 missions).
  • Completed XvT-DB 2-4 (12 missions).
  • Completed XvT-FMC 1 (5 missions).
  • Completed XvT-IS 1 (7 missions).
  • Completed XvT-CAB 3 (8 missions) (Highscores in missions 1,2 & 4!).
  • Completed XvT-CD 1 (9 missions) (Highscores in missions 1,4-7 & 9 and battle highscore!).
  • Completed XvT-DB 1 (4 missions) (Highscores in missions 3 & 4 and battle highscore!).
  • Excellent e-mail activity, as usual. Hope to see you again at #wing_x one of these days, LCM. ;-)

2-2 LCM Verde       

  • Passed [IBX] IWATS Course - 94% (although the Course PROF says it should have been 86% :P)
  • Completed TIE-ID 2-4 (16 missions).
  • Excellent e-mail communications to add to his efforts trying to motivate Flight II pilots into activity.

2-3 LT Brian Klem       

  • Completed TIE-TC 3 & 4 (12 missions).
  • Well, maybe not the MOST communicative of my pilots but he says what he has to say when it should be said and that's more than many people around use to do. Nice e-mails, Lieutenant! :-)

2-4 LT Akur       

  • I suppose he's STILL fighting against his technical problems.
  • Hey there, Lieutenant!! Write us and tell us how is it going! ;-)

3-1 COL Maverick           ( for that nice banner =) )

  • Submitted an excellent banner for "Raise the Flag" graphics division.
  • Completed XWA-TC 31 (6 missions).
  • Completed XWA-TC 32 (5 missions).
  • Completed XWA-TC 33 (4 missions).
  • Nice e-mail communications although I miss his IRC presence a little.

2-3 LT Katherine Cantor Flyer       

  • Uploaded a new uniform into the database.
  • Submitted another excellent banner for "Raise the Flag" graphics division.
  • Completed TIE-TC 201 (30 missions!).
  • Awarded 2 LoCs in "24/7 LoCs" event playing against Captain Wolfblade.
  • Completed TIE-TC 200,225 & 229 (21 missions).
  • Appointed as TCS!
  • Reopens Cyclone mailing list in "Yahoo".
  • Completed TIE-TC 208,213,219 & 223 (22 missions).
  • Splendid e-mail communications and notable presence on #wing_x and #tiecorps!

3-4 LCM Godo Nurok        x 1000

  • Transferred to TIE Corps Reserves under personal request. Farewell, Godo!! Hoping to see you back soon! ^_^


IV.) Do it or DO IT. Don't even dare to try! (aka. Squadron Standing Orders)

  1. Fly AT LEAST a mission/battle from the Compendium!!! You're a pilot, not a wardrobe, and this is important!
  2. Take an IWATS. And if you actually learn something maybe you're doing miracles too! ;-D
  3. Fly some MP. Plenty of comps. to do it. If only you could feel The Power of the Pwnage Side©®!!
  4. Drink; as a truly Challengite this is a must to perform. If only you could feel The Power of the Daze Side of the Booze©®!!
  5. Participate in some competition if possible. Cyclone is here to obliterate any opposition hence our nickname!
  6. For Flight Leaders: I want your weekly reports on Fridays if possible. It's not mandatory but... it's better to not take risks...


Note on order 4: if you can't actually realize this IS NOT a RL way to go you should request transfer to the Sov or something... ¬_¬

V.) Someone flew over the Ewok's Nest (aka. Commander's Corner)


Sorrry, no "NUTS history" this time. Very busy here with my PhD stuff to write something not involving differential equations and/or orbit collision calculations... maybe next week. My apologies. Hell!! But if while I'm writing this report I can't stop trying to figure out how to solve this damned maths problem! (*sigh*) Then again: "You have an ISD for your own nasty behaviours. You need to delete from the map another ISD, a MC80b, an INT, a DGN and all a bloody SSSD. How would you proceed considering that you can't kill anybody (oh noes!) but making them to suffer the pain of losing and having fun from it is mandatory?" >:-P

Come on, Lieutenant! Do you want a nice ISM? I have something ready for you to "test" it... >:)

VI. Who's who on demolishing bussiness (aka. FCHG and Combat Ratings)


Gladiator [GLDR] (4500 points) & Top Ace 1st (400 points)

[4825] & [453] MAJ Zósite Kónstyte Styles

No rank (0 points) & Trainee (1 point)

[4] & [3] LT Cochala

No rank (0 points) & Trainee (1 point)

[2] & [2] LT Lvpps

Grenadier (10 points) & Marksman 4th (10 points)

[24] & [11] CPT Bjorn Wolfblade

Decurion [DCRN] (750 points) & No rank (0 points)

[966] & [0] LCM Vertigo

Cavalier [CAVL] (150 points) & No rank (0 points)

[183] & [0] LCM Verde

Lancer [LANC] (25 points) & No rank (0 points)

[49] & [0] LT Brian Klem

No rank (0 points) & No rank (0 points)

[0] & [0] LT Akur

Legionnaire [LGNR] (400 points) & Certified (5 points)

[425] & [6] COL Maverick

Dragoon [DRAG] (100 points) & Trainee (1 point)

[115] & [2] LT Katherine Cantor Flyer

VII.) It's like playing Twister but... (aka. Squadron Roster & Citations)

W-What?! You want me to paste here the Squadron Roster? Why?! You have it in the TC site... But! But!...
Ok... Ok... you want it you get it!

COMMANDER: MAJ Zosite Konstyte Styles
NICKNAME: The Demolition Crew
BANNER: cyclone.jpg
MOTTO: "Destruction Imminent"
HOMEPAGE: http://cyclone.isdchallenge.net/
MESSAGE BOARD: http://mb.emperorshammer.net/viewforum.php?f=101

Nickname: Eye of the Storm
Motto: "Fear us not. Fear the destruction that comes with us"
1) MAJ Zosite Konstyte Styles
2) LT Cochala
3) LT Lvpps
4) CPT Bjorn Wolfblade

What? NO?!! (*sigh*) Ok... Ok... I got it...

COMMANDER: MAJ Zosite Konstyte Styles
NICKNAME: The Demolition Crew
BANNER: cyclone.jpg
MOTTO: "Destruction Imminent"
HOMEPAGE: http://cyclone.isdchallenge.net/
MESSAGE BOARD: http://mb.emperorshammer.net/viewforum.php?f=101

Nickname: Eye of the Storm
Motto: "Fear us not. Fear the destruction that comes with us"
1) MAJ Zosite Konstyte Styles
2) LT Cochala
3) LT Lvpps
4) CPT Bjorn Wolfblade

Nickname: Wind of Change
Motto: "Changing enemies into space dust"
1) LCM Vertigo
2) LCM Verde
3) LT Brian Klem
4) LT Akur

Nickname: Gale Providers
Motto: "May you have the hell wind at your face and my lasers at your six"
1) COL Maverick
2) LT Katherine Cantor Flyer
3) TBA
4) TBA

Squadron Citations (4):

   TIE-TC Battle 1 - Capture of Zaarin
   TIE-TC Battle 2 - Strike at Calamari
   TIE-TC Battle 3 - New Dimensions
   XWA-TC Battle 2 - First Contact

Respectfully NUTS in service:

--- Zósite Kónstyte Styles, Lord of Moonlightshadow ---

CMDR-COOA-TCS-PROF/MAJ Zosite Konstyte Styles/Cyclone/Wing X/ISD Challenge
SSx3/BSx8/PCx2/ISM/MoI-BC/IS-48BW-27BR-21SW-10SR-19GW-5GR/LoC-RS-TS-IS-CSx8-Rx3/DFC-SW-Rx2/MoC-10BoC-2SoC-1GoC-1PoC-1DoC/CoB/OV [GLDR]

Ace of Dec06-Jan07-Feb07-Mar07-Apr07-Jun07 / Multiplayer Ace of Feb07-Mar07-Apr07-Jun07-Jul07 / TAC's best of Sep07-Oct07 / Wing X Pilot of Dec06-Jan07-Feb07-Apr07-Oct07 / Challenge Top Gun of Jul07 TIE/XWA-Aug07 TIE/XWA-Sep07 TIE/XWA-Oct07 TIE/XWA / Cyclone Pilot of Mar07-Apr07-Jun07

"There's good. And there's evil. And it's the Orde what make us capable of differentiate between them. So, don't bother me judging my actions; if they're good or evil. I'm above both. I serve that ORDER."