D Cyclone NUTS Chronicles #2 C

July 15, MMVII


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< Salute, pilots from Wing X, Wing Commander Angel, Commodore Darklord and last but not least Flight Officer Daniel Bonini >


Welcome to this, my second Weekly Report for my beloved Squadron, the mighty Cyclone, "The Demolition Crew". Last time I checked your Historic Records I became but very decieved. None of you has been transfered yet to M/FRG Faith under an insanity medical condition! Tsk... tsk... that's not the way to perform; let me try again >:)

I.) But I thought I'd find some Kansas flying farm here!! (aka. Squadron News)


V Cyclone Flight III has a new name and motto. At last!! Check the Roster and enjoy my greatfulness and superior imaginative skills. You don't like my humility lacking manners...? well, I don't like the fact that I didn't recieve any suggestion at all on your part... Slackers!!! >:P

U My IWATS related competition designed to boost MP activity around a little was finally approved!! Check it below and be quick if you want one of those fancy IS-GRs. Just for you to know: your beloved FO/TCCOM already got the first of those 5 after making my life miserable for days obliging me to grade his tests again, and again, and again, and...

T New TC wide competition from the Flight Office!! About 15 days left to fly as hell and also looking for highscores now that you're at it! Check below the details and blame on the FO about. He thinks we're some sort of crazy flying machines capable of grab FCHG points from almost... ... ... oh, wait... errr... (*cough*) Fly for the glory of The Empire you! Or something...

S Wing Commander Angel finally decided which missions will his monthly Wing flying competition involve as well as the main subject for his fiction related one. The subject to write about is no other than the promotion of our own former WC RA Darklord to COM and the subsequent promo of Colonel Angel himself to WC. And the 2 missions are:


Ummm... and it seems I already stole one of those fancy highscores from the WC himself. I hope he won't be very pissed off about it. Look, here he comes. Hello there, Sir! I was wondering if you would... what are you doing with that computer terminal, Sir? I haven't been noticed about its transfer and besides, that's not the way to... ?... ?!! NO, WAIT! WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO...?!! DROP IT!!! AAAAAAARGH!!!! X__x

SL Tyrian, Cyclone 3-4, has been AWOLed as soon as I realized we just can't stand his annoying level of communications. He mails nothing, posts nothing, flies nothing and does nothing and that's just too many damned nothings for a single CMDR.

We have a new Squadron patch for the Uniform, folks!! Your own NUTS Commander designed it and you can admire it right here as it's the pic right above this section's title; if you take a close look you'll notice the background is actually a pic of a real cyclone. I also submitted a new uni for myself using it in case you want to check how does it look for real. Well, now we have something that seems to be designed with some true image developing software and not with Super Famicom's Mario Paint! :-P Anyway if you don't like it I'll be more than pleased to receive your own versions and burn... (*cough*) and send 'em to LC Tempest for him to try on his new uniform system.

II.) As if we haven't enough already with all the TC database stuff!! (aka. Squadron Status and On-going Competitions)


R To date I STILL have only LC Beir's files for the competition against the "Squid Heads". What are you waiting for? Look, even if you wait for months it's very unprolly they'll lose their freshness and start rottening! You must fly to beat 'em down, damnit!! >:P You have still until 22th though.

Q Ok, I should have knew it... not a single response from any of you to my "BUTVERYIMPORTANTANSWERTHISTHINGNOWIMTRYINGTOBESERIOUS" mail... (*sigh*) Well, at least I managed to contact with all of you except Captain Wolfblade and Sub-Lieutenant Tyrian; the second has just made a lovely journey to the Phoenix with my regards, and I definitely DON'T WANT to see the first following the same flight path. Captain, write me something damnit! Tell me about your life, your troubles, any chances for me to help you if possible, the weather, your mother-in-law weight, whatever!!! :-|

R A new update to Cyclone website will be ready in no time in order to keep the "Competitions" section as it must be, not to mention the classic fixes here and there. Don't forget to tell me about any bugs and/or inconsistences there if any. I award anti-racoons security duty belts and also anti-disturb rattles just for that!!


II.a) Squadron Competitions

Cyclone & Inferno vs. Green & Red
Details HERE
Now is when we go and show them hell yet AGAIN. Don't fail me guys!! :D

P Cyclone Pilot of the Month July '07 - August '07
Details HERE
The classic competition established by our own LC Beir on its newest edition. I won't participate so YOU KNOW what to do!!

O Cyclone Student of the Month July '07 - August '07
Details HERE
Because here we also learn... slackering at least

N Cyclone über-1337 of the Month July '07 - August '07
Details HERE
This is to boost MP activity so go and fly or else!! >:F

M Guess the Band (DISCONTINUED)
As you can guess with the stepping down of LC Beir this competition has been discontinued as it involved his WSRs... and there's no place for music on my head beyond that of my ion engines and maybe some celtics and metal to accompany!! :P

II.b) Wing / Ship Competitions

L Monthly Art and Literature Award #1
Details HERE
Wing Commander Angel wants us to write, draw... maybe even to learn Origami! Write something for him before he decides to blackmail us to learn about the Ceremony of Tea!!
This month's subject is: (*drumroll*) The promotion of RA Darklord to COM and COL Angel to WC.

L Challenge Top Gun #1
Details HERE
A whole month to fly 2 FREE missions hunting highscores... the best excuses for not flying them will be awarded a rabid Ewok fencing a pitchfork!!
This month's sorties are: TIE-FREE 111 & XWA-FREE 41

L Wing X Pilot of the Week #1
Details HERE
And here we have again the classic Wing X PotW/PotM!! But behold! This time it's a strictly flying one and the Iron Stars come with wings and not ribbons. FLY!! Fly as hell and don't even think why are you doing so and you may get IS-SWs/IS-BWs, a broken joystick and a brand new mental disorder. 3 for the prize of 1!! :D

II.c) Emperor's Hammer / TIE Corps / TC Battlegroups Competitions

Oh! Oh my good Lord!! But if I'm going to repeat some TC site info here. Please, have mercy!! :-P

L TIE Corps Flying Comp - July/07
Details HERE
Our insigne FO wants us to fly 4 battles looking for highscores in 2 weeks!! True story. It seems he doesn't check current TC activity levels very often. But that goes for everybody else because you, Cyclonites... you ARE GOING TO FLY THEM, DO YA HEAR ME?!

L A Mission lasts 15 mins... a "Kill" lasts Forever!!
Details HERE
BWHAHAHAHAHA!!! I want all you fighting in the Arena within 2 months! And if you use some of your precious time to try and learn something you may get even an IS-GR because I say so. See? I toss shinies, train future opponents and you expand your IDline: everybody happy!

L Mr. EH and Ms. EH 2007
Competition Ended
LC Tempest and CM Anahorn Dempsey as Mr. EH and Ms. EH respectively. Isn't it lovely? And they'll have all their honeymoon to develop something for those blasted TIE lasers to be faster than a flowerpot...

L Build that mission!
Details HERE
Commander Dempsey is still looking for a capable guy to hit the 100% in TM/3. Go and teach her what you're capable of!

KA Rise, Fall & a Birthday!!!!!
Details HERE
Do you want a happy TACcy? You know what to do

J Omega Squadron Banner Competition
Details HERE
Why in the hell would you want to make a new banner for the elites? Well, because of the shiny of course!! ;D And glory and blahblahblah

I Fury of the Emperor's Hammer Run-On
Details HERE
I haven't read it yet so why don't you do something for me? Help them to make it interesting enough so I'll have fun when I'll finally read it!

Roster Fact Hunt II
Details HERE
Heh. The competition hasn't been approved yet and the IS-GR and IS-SR have been already awarded. Now what if you announce it with some time left for next edition, Vice Admiral? :-P

H Thursday's Vaping Rhapsody (Multiplayer!!)
My own hosted MP competition! Played on #ehcoo every Thursday from 15:30 EST to 18:30 EST. Either XvT, XWA or IA matches and DFCs available for those skillful enough to get one!

G TIE Corps Capital Brawl (Multiplayer!!)
Hosted by LC Stryker every Wednesday on #ehcoo from 14:00 EST to 19:00 EST. Exclusive FW Multiplayer competition involving capital ships matches. DFCs up for grabs and bribes.

F TIE Corps Training (Multiplayer!!)
Exactly the same as my own competition but hosted also by LC Stryker it happens every Saturday on #ehcoo from 13:00 EST to 16:00 EST.

III.) No activity?!! You're in the Eye of the Cyclone, by Palpatine's sake! You should be at least dying!

III.a) Transfers / Promotions/ Awards / Bribes


1-1 CM Zósite Kónstyte Styles

  • Awarded MoC-PoC
  • Awarded the Bronze Star
  • Awarded 3 LoCs
  • Awarded IS-BR


3-1 LCM Godo Nurok

  • Awarded the Imperial Security Medal


3-4 SL Tyrian

  • Cyclone 3-4 ---> Palpatine knows where. No ghost pilots allowed on the M/FRG Phoenix I'd say...

III.b) General Activity and other dreams alike

( Notation: Low/Crappy Activity Moderate Activity High/Very High Activity Insane Activity/BSF hate!! )


1-1 CM Zósite Kónstyte Styles

  • Installing Freeworlds and setting up it.
  • Graded [MP/2] IWATS
  • Graded [AMP] IWATS
  • Submitted a new Name and Motto for Cyclone Flight III
  • Completed TIE-FREE 264, XvT-FREE 193 and XWA-FREE 86
  • Graded [XML] IWATS
  • Awarded MoC-PoC for communications activity on June
  • Awarded BS from June WME
  • Awarded LoC on "TIE Corps Capital Brawl"
  • Updated INPR
  • Awarded 2 LoCs on "Thursday's Vaping Rhapsody"
  • Completed XvT-FREE 164
  • Created a new Cyclone Squadron patch.
  • Uploaded a new uniform.
  • Compiled WSR.
  • Awarded IS-BR for posting on "A Man(dalorian)'s Tale Pt I" Run On.

1-3 CPT Bjorn Wolfblade

  • No activity. A mail!!! Only a mail and you're safe I tell you!

2-1 LC Kadon Beir

  • Good e-mail and heavy IRC activity

3-1 LCM Godo Nurok

  • Good e-mail activity and some IRC activity
  • Awarded ISM from June WME.

3-2 COL Rei Ayanami

  • IRC activity

3-3 CPT Bodo Dent

  • Some IRC activity

3-4 SL Tyrian x (1000²)³

  • No activity. AWOL you are, Sub-Lieutenant, as I promised. And thanks for your outstanding levels of communication to date. One of these days I'll compile all your mails and maybe I'll have some more blank paper for the printer.

IV.) Do it or DO IT. Don't even dare to try! (aka. Squadron Standing Orders)

  1. Fly AT LEAST a mission/battle from the Compendium!!! You're a pilot, not a wardrobe, and this is important!
  2. Take an IWATS. And if you actually learn something maybe you're doing miracles too! ;-D
  3. Fly some MP. Plenty of comps. to do it. If only you could feel The Power of the Pwnage Side©®!!
  4. Drink; as a truly Challengite this is a must to perform. If only you could feel The Power of the Daze Side of the Booze©®!!
  5. Participate in some competition if possible. Cyclone is here to obliterate any opposition hence our nickname!
  6. For Flight Leaders: I want your weekly reports on Fridays if possible. It's not mandatory but... it's better to not take risks...


Note on order 4: if you can't actually realize this IS NOT a RL way to go you should request transfer to the Sov or something... ¬_¬

V.) Someone flew over the Ewok's Nest (aka. Commander's Corner)

(READ THIS FIRST: Please note that what you're about to read is a fiction, just that. A damned fiction exagerating all which is able to be exagerated within my sick and poor mind. It's OBVIOUS that Cyclone and Inferno are far more active than the crap stated below. If you just can't understand that, please stop reading this, go to the "Roster" section and deal with it instead; I'll test you about its contents in... dunno... 5 years. Begone! :-P )


Major Ace Fighter stands there in the middle of the MC-80b "Squid Bucket" Redemption's Hangar. All his minions behind him and ready for the mayhem on their Flightsuits. What a spooky sight it is with all those pink "Wishbones", A-Wings and Rebel-tainted stuff alike. Now they have their eyes fixed on their opponents who stand right in front of them.

And there they are... their mighty opponents from Cyclone Squadron... Commander Zósite Kónstyte Styles and...

... Commander Zósite Kónstyte Styles!!

As soon as the Red guys stop laughing the Cyclone CMDR speaks ominously:

<CM Zós> Don't take us so easy you "Squid Boys"... you're being ambushed right now >:)

<MAJ Ace> JUAJUAJUAJUAJUA!!! I didn't know that these Hangar Mouse Droids could ambush anybody.

<CM Zós> You think I'm trying to sound funny? Behold! Over there!!

CM Styles runs quickly and hides behind a bunch of big crates. While the Red guys are still looking without even knowing "wtf..." the Cyclone CMDR shows briefly his head and cries:

<CM Zós> HERE!!! We are here and you are doomed!!

<MAJ Ace> What the...? O__o

Now CM Styles abandons the crates and hides behind one of those creepy Y-Wings.

<CM Zós> And here!! You have no chance!! BWHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

<CM Gist> He's not well... :-|

CM Styles on the run again and then hiding yet again behind a poor maintenance worker that was passing over there. After grabbing the poor soul from the throath he cries insanely:

<CM Zós> We're everywhere!! Give up now that you have still time and we'll let you leave!!

<LT Moor> He's hopeless... :___P

Suddenly the (hopeless) Cyclone CMDR gets his commlink and contacts with somebody else.

<CM Zós> Hey! This is CM Styles performing against Red Squadron. How is it going there on the Chal's Hangar against those Green punks, Dempsey? >:D

<CM Dempsey/Ms. EH 2007> HERE!! (*arf*) (*pant*) ... You're ambushed!! Ambushed I tell you!! (*gasp*) (*argh*) ... Over here!! Drop your weapons before we get really pissed off!! (*doh*) (*hmmf*) (*pant*) ...

VI. Who's who on demolishing bussiness (aka. FCHG and Combat Ratings)


Executor [EXCR] (3000 points) & Top Ace 4th (250 points)

[3418] & [282] CM Zósite Kónstyte Styles

Grenadier [GREN] (10 points) & Marksman 4th (10 points)

[24] & [11] CPT Bjorn Wolfblade

Aquilifer [AQFR] (500 points) & Trainee (1 point)

[501] & [3] LC Kadon Beir

Cavalier [CAVL] (150 points) & No rank (0 points)

[196] & [0] LCM Godo Nurok

Dragoon [DRAG] (100 points) & Officer 4th (30 points)

[123] & [31] COL Rei Ayanami

Fusilier [FUSL] (75 points) & Trainee (1 point)

[85] & [2] CPT Bodo Dent

VII.) It's like playing Twister but... (aka. Squadron Roster & Citations)

W-What?! You want me to paste here the Squadron Roster? Why?! You have it in the TC site... But! But!...
Ok... Ok... you want it you get it!

COMMANDER: CM Zosite Konstyte Styles
NICKNAME: The Demolition Crew
BANNER: cyclone.jpg
MOTTO: "Destruction Imminent"
HOMEPAGE: http://cyclone.isdchallenge.net/
MESSAGE BOARD: http://mb.emperorshammer.net/viewforum.php?f=101

Nickname: Eye of the Storm
Motto: "Fear us not. Fear the destruction that comes with us"
1) CM Zosite Konstyte Styles
2) TBA
3) CPT Bjorn Wolfblade
4) TBA

What? NO?!! (*sigh*) Ok... Ok... I got it...

COMMANDER: CM Zosite Konstyte Styles
NICKNAME: The Demolition Crew
BANNER: cyclone.jpg
MOTTO: "Destruction Imminent"
HOMEPAGE: http://cyclone.isdchallenge.net/
MESSAGE BOARD: http://mb.emperorshammer.net/viewforum.php?f=101

Nickname: Eye of the Storm
Motto: "Fear us not. Fear the destruction that comes with us"
1) CM Zosite Konstyte Styles
2) TBA
3) CPT Bjorn Wolfblade
4) TBA

Nickname: Wind of Change
Motto: "Changing enemies into space dust"
1) LC Kadon Beir
2) TBA
3) TBA
4) TBA

Nickname: Gale Providers
Motto: "May you have the hell wind at your face and my lasers at your six"
1) LCM Godo Nurok
2) COL Rei Ayanami
3) CPT Bodo Dent
4) TBA

Squadron Citations (9):
   XvT-TC Battle 4 - Encounter with the Black Sun
   XvT-TC Battle 12 - Odin's Redemption
   XvT-TC Battle 14 - Orion Base Crisis
   XvT-TC Battle 20 - Mysterious People
   XvT-TC Battle 21 - Project X: the T-65C A2 project
   XvT-TC Battle 22 - Rebel Cargo
   XvT-TC Battle 24 - Princess Tatoka's Meeting
   XvT-TC Battle 32 - Wing XIV: WC Trouble
   XWA-TC Battle 2 - First Contact

Respectfully NUTS in service:

--- Zósite Kónstyte Styles, Lord of Moonlightshadow ---

CMDR-COOA-TCS-PROF/CM Zosite Konstyte Styles/Cyclone/Wing X/ISD Challenge
SSx2/BSx6/PC/ISM/MoI/IS-20BW-24BR-6SW-5SR-14GW-1GR/LoC-RS-CSx9-Rx2/DFC-BW-Rx2/MoC-6BoC-1SoC-1GoC-1PoC/CoB [EXCR]

Ace of Dec06-Jan07-Feb07-Mar07-Apr07-Jun07 / Multiplayer Ace of Feb07-Mar07-Apr07-Jun07 / Wing X Pilot of Dec06-Jan07-Feb07-Apr07 / Cyclone Pilot of Mar07-Apr07-Jun07

"There's good. And there's evil. And it's the Orde what make us capable of differentiate between them. So, don't bother me judging my actions; if they're good or evil. I'm above both. I serve that ORDER."